Kissing Frogs

So my LP and I were having quite the entertaining e-mail conversation about dating and all that jazz. The end result for both of us was, I'm over kissing frogs. LOL.

At this point (age), in our lives, dating for sport is pretty old and boring. Of course we try to convince ourselves that it's fun to meet different people ,(initially it is), but after starting from scratch for the umpteeth time, it's a lot less fun. Though some people think that being with one person goes against biology, (I'll say no names :-P), people get tired of playing the game and eventually settle down.

I agree with my E-Hubs that it is difficult to meet people of substance. It sounds cruel but it is so true. People are too busy trying to impress you (acting like princes), instead of being who they really are(frogs). This is true of males and females. I know decent guys who are over all the BS that comes with dating as well.

We are too damn old for jump offs, booty calls, f-ck friends...whatever you want to call it. E-Hubs said that too many people want sex without the committment and unfortunately, he's right. Folks that are content with being in the aforementioned roles, make the need for relationships moot. Why buy the entree when you can fill up on side dishes?

There have to be some people that still believe in healthy relationships. So I guess we'll kiss a few more frogs and soon enough one will be a prince or princess.

Body Snatchers

I was in one of my 'not feeling people' moods a couple weeks ago and E-Hubs asked what was up. I replied, 'people suck' and I'm over dealing with them as a whole. The conversation went from there.

I don't know when it happened or why but it seems that people in general just fell off. A big statement, I know, but it's true. Was there a day when everyone just decided that they were going to stop being genuine? Who sent out this mass memo? It's like there's a whole new generation of body snatchers walking around these days.

When did it become cool to be fake? When did it become cool to lack motivation? Have people just given up on self improvement? I just don't get it. We're too damn old for partying to be our motivating force  and we're too damn young to be content doing nothing. (insert rolling of the eyes here)

There's so much more to life and the world than our immediate surroundings and it seems that too many people can't see that. I don't know if they're truly that happy in their lives or they just don't care enough to change the way they're living. It's unfortunate and I'm glad I missed the body snatcher memo!

Check Yourself

I'll be the first to admit that I, can at times, be an ass. I'm sarcastic, have a flip mouth and a twisted sense of humor. (Shut up, Play!)

When I'm not in the mood to deal with people, for whatever reasons, I withdraw. It's horrible, (or so I've been told), but it's also how I deal. I am a strong believer that negative energy is contagious. I don't want to burden anyone else with whatever is going on with me or be foul towards them because I haven't processed my own stuff. *shrugs shoulders*

That being said, people need to check their attitude at the door! If you're in a bad mood, keep it to yourself cause stank moods are contagious. Just had to get that off my chest cause I felt the negativity of someone else, creeping up on me. Have a nice day. That is all!

I Do. I Do. I Do. I Do.

So the other night I was flipping channels and happened on this show called Sister Wives. The show follows a Mormon family of twenty one. One man, four wives and sixteen children between them. WTF?! I sat there astonished by what I was seeing but I couldn't turn the channel. Then yesterday, the same people were on Oprah. Now, I'm normally not a fan of Oprah (for my own reasons) but I sure did watch yesterday.

I started to wonder how the hell they thought this was a normal lifestyle. Isn't the concept of plural marriage an oxymoron? Isn't conventional marriage supposed to be one man and one woman? This man is winning all around. He has four wives whom he has on a schedule. They all have a certain number of nights with him per month and he takes them out on solo dates. The way I see it, he's benefiting over and over and over and over again. Shady.

What about the kids? We're in the 21st century. Why have all those children? They aren't working farms and helping provide for the family. I know people that struggle with one child. How the hell is he supporting sixteen and four wives?

I was talking to my dad about this show, (yeah, I was really stuck on it) and he says, "You know a man came up with that religion." Yes, sir. Joseph Smith to be exact. Then we were talking about if other ethnic groups could practice polygamy and we both figured that too was a definite NO.

Why get married at all? Only his marriage to his first wife is legal. He's essentially cheating on his wife, having bastard children and it's okay with the whole family. Oh, wait. They're letting cameras follow them around and document their illegal lifestyle. WOW!

Farewell, Randy Moss..

This is a sad day for Patriot Nation! It was that damn "press conference." He became the Rod Tidwell of the Patriots (Jerry Maguire). I don't know where they are going to find another wide receiver of his caliber, capable of one handed catches, parting defenses, making big plays, but they better start looking.





Something New?

I was having a conversation with E-Hubs and interracial dating came up. He says, "blog about that" so here goes nothing.  This should be interesting.

Let's be honest, when folks hear interracial couple, they automatically think one person in the couple is black and the other is white. What we often forget or find less offensive (yeah, I'm keeping it real) is when both people are members of groups that are in the minority. Why that is, I just don't know.

During said conversation, he says to me that more and more black men are dating outside of their race because black women have become "passe." This statement annoyed me because how could he, as a black man, ever think that his counterparts are "passe." [Side note, I think passe is one of the snootiest words.]

That's as bad as my dark skinned friend saying she doesn't date black men. Umm. Honey, you're foolish. You obviously came from a black man. You are raising a son to be a black man. Get it together.

As for black women, I see them more often with Spanish guys and even Asians more than White men. I'm sure there are a whole heap of different reasons for that. I actually think it's a bit easier for a black man to date anyone outside his race. Black women give each other enough grief over who they choose within their race, never mind stepping outside.

You would think that in the year 2010, interracial dating would be more socially acceptable. I really don't think it is. Couples have their friends, that of course see them for who they are together, not so much their color. What about others that aren't in their immediate circle? I would think it would be difficult to be in a relationship and then have to deal with

1)what other people think about the choice you made,

2) people feeling a little too free to tell you what they think of said choice

3) glaring at you when you're out.

I consider myself to be a pretty strong individual but I don't know if I could deal with constantly having to debate over my choosing a white mate. (Keeping it real again.)

That's my two cents on that issue. There you go E-Hubs.

I Do....Until I Don't

I love documentaries!! I will watch one about just about anything. The other night, I caught one about infidelity in marriage. It followed two women who went outside of their marriage.

The first woman was married for about 8 years, had a set of twins and a pretty normal life. Somewhere along the line, she decided she was bored and her devoted husband was no longer the man for her. She then decided to have a relationship with her co-worker (a definite no no). She left the home she made with her husband, bought a new house, moved this man into her new home with her children. Fast forward -->she realized after spending quite some time with her Mister that she missed her husband and ended up re-marrying him. Smh.

The second woman was having communication and fertility issues with her husband. She started "hanging out" with her ex-boyfriend who also happened to be a co-worker. Smh. Needless to say, that went on for quite some time. She ended up pregnant. (She and her husband were Asian, her baby was black.) Fast Forward-->Her married bf (15yrs) shunned her, she gave his baby up, husband took her back, they had a little girl of their own.

I couldn't believe it! I started really thinking about what I'd just watched and had conversations about it with my married friends. One said (and I still can't believe she said it): "If you don't know, it can't hurt you. After all, you're not meant to be with just one person." The second (who is a newlywed) said: "People don't try hard enough to make things work before giving up. Marriage isn't always easy. No relationship is."  Now, I would have to go ahead and agree with the second friend.

I began to wonder, when people adopted such non-chalant attitudes about marriage. Do vows mean nothing anymore? If not, what's the point of going thru the trouble of developing a relationship and spending a whole heap of money on a wedding, if you're ultimately going to do what you want? The first friend said the point was to "build a life, start a family, have someone to wake up to..." Ummm, okay. Maybe it's just me, or maybe it's the fact that my parents have been together forever (through  good and bad times) but I thought vows meant something. Some folks will read this and say it's easy to say because I'm not married. It seems more and more though that people are all gung ho about saying 'I Do', the honeymoon period ends, things get rough, then ultimately divorce. :-(

eenie meenie miney mo

I went to lunch this past weekend with a friend. During the course of conversation, I was told that I was 'too picky'. The statement was followed by, "You're picky with food, picky with sex, picky with men." Uh....isn't that a good thing? 

There are particular things that I know I am very picky about. For instance, I was picking onions (that I didnt ask for) off my sandwhich. I hate onions! (BTW, this is where the aforementioned picky comment came into play.) I don't like seeds in tomatoes or cucumbers. I don't like cooked fruit.  So on and so on.

As for being picky with sex/men.....WOW. No really, WOW! Isn't that a GREAT thing? Wouldn't I have a bad rep otherwise and be one of those women we talk about? LOL. Let's just say, I've made mistakes in the past, who shall remain nameless. LMAO. Aren't we supposed to learn from our mistakes? If we continue with the same pattern of behavior, where does personal growth and change come into play?

Everyone is different and thus have different taste. I know what I like. I know what I want. If that makes me too picky, so be it. As we get older, we have to be more particular in what we want in a mate because everyone is a potential spouse.

And that's all I've got to say about that.